Getting Your Degree From Harvard – A Play In One Act

Its been a while since we had any theater around here.

The Scene:
Our main character is approaching the corner of North Harvard and Soldiers Field road, traffic is brisk and moving, the main character is in the left hand land in preparation for an upcoming left turn.

Actors:
biker (played by yours truly)
Bro-dude 1 (played by Harvard student with Harvard jacket and Harvard hat on, backwards)
Bro-dude 2 (played by Harvard student with Harvard jacket and Harvard running pants on)

*Bro-dudes are looking left as they cross into the street, apparently to avoid on coming traffic from the left hand lane, they fail miserably and traffic in that lane screeches to a halt, they somehow manage to make it to the center line alive, only to nearly be hit by the biker, the scene starts as they stare slack jawed at the biker track standing inches in front of them*

Biker: *looks bro-dudes up and down* “So you guys go to Harvard?”

Bro-dude 1: *looks flattered* “Yes, yes we do”

Bro-dude 2: *smirks out a shit eating grin*

Biker: *pulls around bro-dudes* “Smart enough to go to Harvard, but can’t cross the street.”

*The sky erupts with fireworks and a giant +10 Pts sign appears made of gold in the sky surrounded by sparkling lights. A deep bellowing voice, like a mix between James Earl Jones, and God himself, is heard to intone “BUUUUURN SAUCE!” shaking the very fabric of creation*

Bro dude 2: *clearly devastated, struggles to find a response* “Uhh…Whoa there Lance.”

Biker: *Rides to work feeling good that a couple of Bro-dudes from Harvard think he is like Lance Armstrong*

And…scene.

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